It's My Weekend Off!

 Even though there are a lot of things going on this weekend, I still can not go anywhere with my kids. Well my daughter because my son has to work this weekend, that's okay. Also, I have a final due this weekend, this morning though, I took the time to clean my living room. I recently purchased an air purifier for our home, due to our three dogs have accumulated an enormous amount of dust and dander in our home.  My kids received the package from FedEx and they took it out of the box brand new and already the purifier is collecting so much dust and dander. I told my daughter I would have to purchase another air purifier for our rooms. Two in the living room and one in our bedroom, it's insane how much dust is in the air, especially in our living room. I am overwhelmed by the dust, but I keep telling myself that I asked for it, I took on the stress of having dogs.

Another thing is that one of my other dogs is digging its way out of our perfectly made chain link fence, escaping into the neighborhood. I had to fix the last hole he dug and literally our dog moved cinder blocks away from the area of the hole! It worked for a while, until this morning, I caught him digging another hole under the chain-link fence. I was furious at him, now he is in his kennel, so now, I have to fix another hole dug from under the chain-link fence. I am glad that I have this weekend off even though I have a final due tomorrow, I am still thankful for this weekend. 

I know there are things in life that go on and on, however, I had to take a small tiny break from my studies. Life gets too hectic and it gets stressful, my daughter has a birthday coming up and I want to make it special for her. Saving money is a challenge for me and for my daughter. We decided last night to make it a team effort to leave funds alone on one of our debit cards. Her goal is to save at least $1000.00 for her trip to Phoenix, AZ. I am praying that all will be good to go to do that. It has always been a challenge to do this, but I think this would be a great way to learn along with her and with me in it. I hope we can do it and make it happen. 

I am still on my studies, having a discussion due tomorrow my brain is getting there in exhaustion. I try not to feel exhausted or defeated in my goals towards a better life for my family. My son who is 18 years old will be working on his certificate in Cyber Security, I pray that he accomplishes the final journey to receiving a certificate. So it would be just me and my daughter withstanding the time together. It seems so fast how life just goes on, one of the things in my life is trying to make it as a Native American Woman in Western Society.

As a single mother, it sucks. I have always hated being a single mother, seeing other women work in their household while the hubby brings home extra money to pay for bills. My parents were that way until my mom was hit with diabetes. I hate diabetes too. Life throws those curve balls and you have to dodge them somehow. So I am a Christian woman, however, I like to call myself a Jesus lover, Christ-follower, anyway, I love Jesus Christ. I am constantly talking to Him every day, constantly crying to Him... literally. An example is yesterday, I am not really a fussy employee, I try not to be and I also try not to see differences. I wasn't raised that way. But, since working at the organization that I work at which is over a year, I have never felt accepted. I try to do the job accordingly, I really do my best to meet the needs of the providers and the patients. However, it's that acceptance from others who seem to think I am not good enough to do the job of a Care Coordinator.

It's predominately a white company, the upper people are all white, with the exception of some Spanish employees who work there. I guess what really bothered me yesterday was the fact that I was never given a raise after working my full year. I kept thinking in my head, maybe next paycheck they'll surely put that quarter raise on there. Two weeks go by, and then another, then the same. No quarter raise like I had anticipated. I wonder how many other employees have been given their quarter raise? I know it's just a quarter, but to me, that is my integrity and my pride in my job. I know I shouldn't give a big woop about it, but I do, nowadays, especially being a single Native American Indian woman in Western Society does really mean a lot.

Continuing In Life As Usual

    I am not sure how to start this blog that I have had from time to time, the last blog, I was supposed to run. However, in that month, I was subdued to the flu, the cold, and bronchitis. I hate January's they always seem to bring the most horrible aspect of either being ill from the flu or some unexpected surgical emergency. Luckily, it was just the flu and bronchial infections, that, I am very thankful for. One thing to note is I am doing my keto lifestyle again, and it has been really great. I love feeling better about myself and knowing that I can fail at it and not feel guilty. I don't drink alcohol anymore, completely sober, except enjoying my kombucha (having at least 1% alcohol) now and then, my daughter is always getting on me about that, she is such a little mommy to me when it should be the other way around. She says, "It adds up mom, only drink it... like never!" I am so pleased with her as a daughter, she has been through a lot this past year with the pandemic going on, and changing as a young lady. My son struggled as well, it has been a fight to get through these teen years for him. But his journey still continues, I am hopeful for him to be successful in life with whatever his heart desires. For both my children, their generation is going to be the ones who are going to be the strongest and be the most successful. At least that is what I believe of them.

    Recently, I've had a change in my position as a Care Coordinator, I am taking on a new position. Instead of working with the older population concerning Annual Wellness Visits (AWV), I will be working in the area of Pediatrics at the main building of our division. At first, I wasn't sure if I made the right decision, but the more and more I thought of it, I was thinking this was an opportunity to explore other areas of the division. I am also still pursuing my Masters in Healthcare Management in Public Health. Which I thought would help in understanding the operations or the layout of how a primary care organization would run. In the other area of my job, I learned a lot as far as Medicare and Medicaid are concerned along with other primary health insurances patients utilize. The patterns of ER usage in the hospital and how we can help alleviate the overuse of emergency care. It isn't an easy task to take on, however with collaboration involved with other care management and coordinators, we can at least help patients in a better quality of care. Really, that is what it is all about, quality of care and also being able to help patients have access to healthcare services. These are the things I have greatly learned while being in the healthcare sector, and it has only been a year to learn all these fundamentals of what a healthcare organization is all about. It is so interesting, as well as obtaining the knowledge in an organization that caters to a population in need. It is definitely a huge spectrum of healthcare, and I really enjoy it.

 The New Year 2022

Today is the third of January of another brand new year, our family had a pleasant time together during New Year's Eve. This was my second year being sober during New Year's Eve as well, it was just my kids and I at home just watching the time of finale with the fireworks going off in the neighborhood. Our dogs were uneasy with the bombing sounds of fireworks going off in celebration. The one thing we didn't do was go outside to watch the display, it was so cold, there was snow finishing off from a storm that came through. It was absolutely amazing with New Year's Eve, the snow was wet and cold, but at the last, it was settling into being a powder effect. I loved the weather, the more the snow the better it would be, when weather like this arises in our area, I am very thankful and pray more weather like this will continue. A lot of people do not like it, the only reason why I love it is when summers come around it becomes so much better for us to enjoy. The animals are happier with the water available and the fish is abundant with life.

When the first day finally arrived and January was here, I was able to start on a challenge I signed up for on Facebook prior to the beginning of the New Year. American Red Cross funding page was presented to me, over and over while skimming through my Facebook. I thought this would be a great opportunity to catch up on my cardio. I have to have cardio workouts, I have to admit as I have always admitted that I have a body image issue. I am never happy with my body, the only thing that irritates me is my belly, I am reminded of my mother who was the same concerning her weight. She hated her belly fat, and I am exactly the same as she was, frustrated with the fact that I can't fit into anything! However, my daughter and I are attending a training class together and it has been really good. I really enjoy the time in the gym to learn about our physical strength and to build more on that strength. Anyway, as I was starting the next day on New Years Day I was able to start my miles to achieve. The miles we have to meet for the month of January 2022 is 60 miles. So on my first day, I achieved 2.33 miles of walking, I wanted to jog the miles, but it was so snowy and thick outside that I couldn't do it. I suppose I could have tried, I ended up walking due to the slick places of the trail ahead of me, there were streets covered in snow, the sidewalks were covered in snow as well. I needed to walk, I thought maybe going to the gym, there is the treadmill that can be of use to generate the needed miles by jogging it. I would like to do 3 miles or if I was bored, maybe more if my body can handle it. 

So much goes into having the perfect New Year's Day start, people on Facebook posted dinners with blackeye peas and corn beef for good luck. It was a busy day, and maybe there were some who were stressed as well, and also dreadful, talking about kids going back to school. My kids are in dread going back to school. Oh yes, and the second day of January I put in 2 miles again. Today after work, I hope to put more miles in for the American Red Cross funding. My goal for donations is $250.00, my page on my Facebook is https://www.facebook.com/donate/3055887481290720/, please if you are reading this blog, can you donate any amount. It will help so much, I will continue to put in the miles for the month of January 2022.

The Day After Christmas 2021

 The day after Christmas 2021, it is nearing the end of the year, what things to expect for the New Year? Oh my goodness, I think there is a lot to look forward to! I signed up for a fundraising event to run X amount of miles for X amount of time. I start on the first of January, the thing is I hope to be accountable for the commitment. Yesterday was Christmas and it was lovely with just my kids and me, we had a few gifts to give to one another and a wonderful, delicious prime rib dinner. It is always a great time to have prime rib for the family to enjoy. There is still some leftover to have today, but not a lot, I made the best A'Ju, and mashed potatoes and gravy. I didn't dress up yesterday, although I guess I should have. I was lazy, the thing about me is that lately, life has been very busy. So when the time comes up to where I can stay home and not work and the opportunity to be lazy is there, then I do not attempt to dress up. Unless I have a date to attend, then I will attempt to dress up and look nice. My kids, I have a soon-to-be 18-year-old boy and a 14-year-old daughter, they both like to do the same thing, which is staying up late and getting up late in the afternoon. 

Oh my goodness next month I have to clean up EVERYTHING, I mean there is a lot to do, my son who is going to be 18 years old will need a birthday party, gathering of some sort. Which his birthday is in January, he was born in the year 2004, that year was a miracle to have him. My brother announced to me last night that he will be coming this way to celebrate my son's birthday with his family. That means, also my dad and my sister will come too! I have so much to do before then, I know it doesn't seem a lot but when family comes it is huge. There will be at least 5 dogs in the house just wandering around! It will be a pretty full house, I am telling you... also at the same time, I have butterflies thinking about my family being here. So that being said, I am so terribly excited to have this place full of life and laughter, yes I certainly love my family. 

Oh The Weekend

It’s Monday and there is the chill in the air again, not as cold as it was last week. My children are still in bed and school starts today for them again, that reminds me, it's Columbus Day today! I wonder if they really go back to school today. Yes, they still attend school today, I am surprised they are not celebrating Columbus Day? I guess they are respecting the Native American Indians of how they feel about the holiday, that’s really kind of the Mesa County school district. For me, since I am an Indian I could care less about the either-or of the holiday. This last weekend was a mission accomplished for me, I went to Moab, UT last Friday night to get ready for my 10k run, I had my evening all planned to have a good stretching night. Prep before the big day, but I made the mistake to go out that night with a good friend. Not that I didn’t enjoy it, but the whole time I wanted to get back to my dad’s house and crash and rest for the run on Saturday. Instead, I wanted to hang out with a friend of mine who I haven’t seen in a while. Went to the Rio in town where I haven’t been since Lord only knows when met an Irishmen who was trying to pick me up. To tell you the truth I was not into getting with no one that night all I wanted to do was to go home. We ended up at Woody’s bar and met some really nice guys who were very gentlemen, they were married men who were surprisingly faithful men! Yes, these men who were very good-looking men were committed to their wives, it was very cool to see. Unless there was a catch but they made no moves at all towards us, not me and not my friend. They were so cool and for me, it was a breath of fresh air to have met men who love their wives and love their children. Well, the night ended at midnight and I had to drop my friend off at her home and I back to my abode at my dad’s place.  My dad still has his home in Moab, UT and so it’s nice to stop in from time to time to hang out and relax. I brought my computer and some movies from home, I had a small dinner prepared and a glass of wine prior to going out that Friday night. It was supposed to be a nice, relaxing night to be alone and enjoy time quietly and think. I was going to write a blog this day but I didn’t, I was too excited for the next day. I fell asleep and slept well, I awoke at 5:30am and got ready, and the great thing about getting out of the house is you don’t have to look pretty or smell nice. You just get your stuff and get out the door. I didn’t have to put make-up on or anything, so I got there a little bit before 8am and got my stuff for the race and took some selfies by the Newspaper Rock.
The Newspaper Rock is an interesting piece of history, no one knows why this was created. Some think it was a place where the ancient ones stopped to give news of their travel and of who they were. This place is loaded on one rock with petroglyphs, it’s beautiful and it’s worth seeing before you head into the Canyonlands National Park. For me, it is a place where my people roamed and where they hunted and camped. Sometimes when I am in a place like this area, where history is so vibrant and so obvious it makes me wonder about the area long ago. How it really was back in the day, of course, there were no paved roads and there were no officials to keep you out of certain areas. We started out at the Newspaper Rock parking lot and proceeded out toward the Needles. I had my MapRun going and my music playing it was good. The fast runners ran ahead of me, I kept my pace as I always do, others tried to keep up with the fast runners. But I finished my run at about an hour and 15min was my time. There was a kid in the race who made it in 38min! He’s a track student at one of the local high schools in the area, 6.2miles in 38min. unbelievable to me for sure. I finally made it to the finish line and I was so happy to have made it, I didn’t stop only for water and to unloose my shoelace and then I was on my way again. All in all, I was very proud of myself, I headed back to Moab, got to my dad’s place, and watched a bit of a movie and then I headed back to Grand Junction, CO again. I started to miss my kiddies, they spent the night at their friend’s house Friday night, and it all worked out the way it was supposed to. Kids were happy to see me and the house was as it was the last time we left it. I noticed the landlord was there and he covered the air conditioning panel up for the winter. He also moved our garbage can into the garage for us, I guess it belongs in the garage. I really have to organize the garage too, so many things to do and to clean and to throw out. It’s never-ending! I liked it when we were away, away from the unorganized mess, anyway tomorrow is another day and it’s a day full of stuff. Anyhow have a good day on your Monday and hope you all enjoy the holiday of you are celebrating it, I wished I was, paid holiday. One day I’ll be in one of those jobs where I get paid on holidays…

Momentum of the day

YAY! Today is Friday, October 7, 2016 and I am so ready to get out of town. This will be my first weekend off since two months ago in August, I will be heading out to the Needles National Park near Monticello to do a 10k run. They have sent me an email indicating the schedule and the times to when I need to be tomorrow morning! Along with some additional information if I needed it, but I’m sure I’m all set. The tentative plan is after work at 3pm today I need to gather up my stuff when I get home, get my daughter geared up to go with me, and send my son on his way to his friend’s house. Now unless my daughter changes her mind, she will be going with me, which is unless she changes her mind to stay with her friend here instead. My little girl is such a beautiful little girl, she means a lot to me, I guess it’s the mommy and daughter feeling you have. With my daughter she keeps me in check with myself, she is like the guard and my protector. She makes sure I don’t do anything stupid like be with the wrong guy, she is very keen about things like that. My daughter reminds me of my own mom, always telling me what to do and it’s eerie but she looks at me like my mom used to when she was upset with me. Someone once told me “mothers and daughters have the same egg”, I think this is the reason we are so close. So when the daughter has a little girl, the little grand-daughter has her grandmothers and mothers eggs. This is the reason grandmothers are so close to their grand-daughters, because they have the same eggs. When my daughter heard me and my sister talk about her eggs, she looked us with her huge beautiful eyes and said, “I have EGGS?” I guess she was thinking she had eggs like a bird, she was so cute when she heard us talk about grandma’s eggs and my eggs, my sister’s egg and then her eggs. So it’s something I have to get into more details with my daughter when she gets a bit older. Aside to the egg bit, the saga continues with the organization subject, yesterday I came home and it seemed like the place was cleaner than it was the other day? So I asked my son about his day and if he had cleaned. Of course his answer was “no”, I was stunned to the fact the house was not a total mess as it is all the time. So I was well pleased with the way things looked, except we still need a vacuum cleaner. I suppose I could hire someone to vacuum my house, just vacuum. An interesting thought and a brilliant idea! Anyway I came home, I had to put on my gear to go run otherwise I won’t be able to get out of my chair to change into my running gear. So I immediately went upstairs put on my sports bra, my running pants, and my socks and shoes. Then I sat down and watched a bit of TV, I guess it’s the calm before the storm which means before I get out and start my regimen. It’s a process for me to get out and start my workout, I have to first tell myself, “You have to get going, you have to get up and get out the door.” Sometimes it’s a fight with myself, most times the running girl inside of me wins, other times it’s a toss-up. But once I’m out the door and out stretching and getting my earphones on and have my phone set on my MapRun I’m usually good to go. Now it’s not the most pleasant when I am out starting on my run, it’s the first 5min or 10min into my run where I really have to focus and coach myself to keep up, get myself in place with the road ahead of me. Constant coaching myself all the time, for me it’s hard to get going with my run, I have to think of ways to get a good, good, good workout. I love to sweat and it’s crucial that I must have hills to run, all in all my run has uphill trails in the neighborhood. I end up having more than one hill to climb while I run, it’s exhausting but it’s essential to keep the momentum up. It’s all about momentum and it’s all about the will to keep going no matter how much it hurts. I want to always push myself in this way, no pain no gain, it’s an awesome feeling to have for yourself. I have to admit, I wish I was a skinny little thing so I can run farther than I do now. I want to go farther into the long stretch of miles, let’s say about 20miles or so. I just need to train myself to consistently eat lean, eat clean and be persistent in my quest. I have to really train my brain in this area, just like all other areas in my life, like my home. I have to train my brain to conquer the unorganized self and make it better in being better organized. I have to have a starting point with myself, with my brain, it’s a chore to do. It’s just like my running, I have to get up, get going out the door, but in this case get up and pick up a trash bag and pick up stuff. The brain is a remarkable organ of our body, it’s the part of us that tells the body what to do. The circuit board to our human body, what we feel, how we respond, what we choose to do and it basically commands all other organs to operate. Isn’t that amazing! We are generated by a soft tissue protected by a hollow cavity called the skull. That is why we have to make sure we protect our delicate living operable tissue inside our skull. I love the brain, it’s the best part of the body, with this we can learn and we can do, we can know and we can continue to learn all the time. It never ceases in learning and gaining knowledge, this is why God created us so perfect, it was meant to survive and it was meant to send signals to the heart to feel and to know. Without our brain we can’t love and we can’t help, and we can’t carry on. So love your brain and love yourself, because we only have one body and one life. I will love you brain, I will carry on and I will try my best to conquer this thing called organization. Good luck to me on my run tomorrow and let’s hope all goes as planned. I hate planning it never turns out the way it’s supposed to.